Goodbye 2012, Hello 2013! (A year end blog)

                                  Year 2012 became a fruitful year for me. I can say that this is the best year so far, I’m fortunate that God granted me most of my wishes for year 2012, although some failed to happen, I’m still grateful that I had so many blessings this year and it wouldn’t be possible without God.  

First, when I graduated College on time which we considered a hard battle, because before we got there, we’ve experienced struggles like Comprehensive examinations and stuffs. Second, when I passed the Qualifying examination (a pre-requisite to be able to take the June-July Nurse’s Licensure Examination).  Third, when I passed the board exam and finally become a Registered Nurse, which is a dream come true. Fourth, I was also able to work as a volunteer nurse in a lying-in clinic which helped me gained experience and enhanced my nursing skills in OB/DR concepts and through this somehow, I helped my parents financially. Those 4 mentioned above was the highlight of my 2012, best blessings for this year which played an important role in my life, to enter the next stage of my life which is my career, and became my inspiration to transpire tomorrow’s challenges.

And like what I’ve mentioned earlier, some of my wishes failed to happen. It was my dream to find the “right guy” for me. Maybe God is trying to tell me that this is not the right time/year for it, because there are significant matters that I need to prioritize more than anything else, like the pursuance of my studies and the beginning of my career which is indeed significant. Besides,  “Everything happens for a reason”, and whatever reason it is, it’s God’s way of letting us know he has better plans for us.  Anyway, I’m still thankful that even I haven’t found that right guy yet; I still have my God, family and friends who loved me for who I am and is always there for me no matter what happens, they’re the best companions ever.

Speaking of what I considered “best companions” First, with my relationship with God, it was firm this year, no one can hinder it. By realizing that he grant us so much blessings, by being always there for us, by not letting us down and by letting us know that no matter how hard a problem is, there’s always a reason to be happy. With all of these,  I promised to serve Him more, to prove it, I joined other religious activities, like Singles for Family and Life (formerly Singles for Christ) my main purpose was not just to fulfill my promise but to commit myself to the Lord, to become his worthy servant and to deserve everything  he done for us. Second, my family, I can say that our relationship as a family become stronger by being together through thick and thin, joy and sorrow with God binding us as one.  And It’s just timely that last October my dad went home from abroad, even though he’s not present during my Graduation Day, I understand and at least after how many years we celebrate Christmas again with him. Third, when it comes to friends, this year, I kept and gained a lot of friends.  The ones that I kept are my High school friends; though we’re not that in-touch with each other compared when we’re still classmates (due to busy schedules) we still had that mutual feeling to be there for each other. And to my College friends, we’ve been together not only through joyous times of our lives but also in struggling to achieve our main goal which is to succeed, and I’m just delighted knowing that we all graduated and took the board exam together, although two of my friends didn’t make it, we still supported them all the way and let them know that we all succeeded in our different ways. And to my other friends that no matter how far they were or how many years have been, we still treasure each other as friends. And for those friends that I gained, they’re my brothers and sisters in the community of Singles For Family and Life, It feels so good to bond with them knowing that they’re not just my friend but my brothers and sisters in Christ whom I share my life experiences with and I’m looking forward to be with them in fulfilling our journey as a SFL member and as a servant of God. And to some that I met in some of the events of my life, I’m also looking forward to play an important role in their lives as their friend and vice versa.

Furthermore, before this year ends, I just want to express my deepest gratitude first to God Almighty for everything that happened this year whether good or bad, I can say it became an experience that enabled me to learn a lesson from it and molded my personality which made me a better person than before. And to those people who became a part of my year 2012, I’m looking forward to a more fruitful friendship and relationship with them in 2013 and more coming years.

God is indeed the best, 2012 is about to end and I already got my first blessing for 2013 (start of my work in a hospital this January 2013).

For year 2013, all I wish for is more blessings to shower upon us, to my loved ones, more happiness to every individual, more positive aspects (strength, good health, love, unity, peace, etc.) and less negative aspects (disaster, war, confusions, problems, heartaches, hatred, anxieties, etc.) and for my personal wish, no need to scribble or verbalize it because God already knows what my heart desires.  In addition to this, all I can promise this year is to turn out to be a better person I can be, to avoid the wrong things instead, do the right ones. And by being a nurse in profession, I pledge to practice my profession not only in mind but also in heart, to respond in situations seeking for medical assistance by extending my help to everyone most especially to those who most need it.

And by welcoming year 2013, I want to leave all the awful memories that happened to the Philippines, to my family and to me from year 2012 and treasure the good ones, positive aspects and everything that I learned.

Let’s all welcome 2013 with love in our hearts and smile on our faces! J A prosperous new year to all! J

Carried away with emotions

Hmm, how do I start?

*SIGH*

I just want to express this feeling right now.

My parents and I just argued regarding my job. From the start, I just wanted to gain experience to become a competent nurse someday since it's just recent when I graduated and passed the board exam. And since I volunteered to be in that clinic, of course salary was just limited. I'm not saying that my parents required me to help them financially, they just wanted me to have a stable job for me to supply my personal needs without their help, it's just that I feel pressured whenever they open up about finding a more "stable" job. I also felt like they're not giving me a chance to explore my profession (being a nurse) and they wanted me to enter the world of reality (pressure, stress, etc.) right away. But I know, I'm just carried away with my emotions that's why I'm acting like I'm misunderstood by my own parents.

Well, through time, I know this feeling will pass by. I just want to help myself regain from being hurt through expressing it through blog. I love my parents and I know they also feel the same way more than I do, and all they want is the best for us. And now I understand why they want  me to have a stable job.

Life is ironic.

Life is so ironic, isn’t it?

The ones we love, ignores us and the ones we doesn’t love, loves us. - A logical statement that no one can answer. 

*sigh* bakit ganun? 

Let’s look at both sides: Hindi naman naten pwedeng pilitin yung taong mahal naten to love us back, they have their own feelings in the first place, and kung mapipilitan lang sila, tayo lang yung masaya, pero sila, hindi. And at the end, tayo lang yung masasaktan. :”( Hindi din naman naten pwedeng pilitin yung sarili naten na mahalin yung taong nagmamahal saten, unfair naman yun sa part nila kase napipilitan lang tayo na mahalin sila and at the same time unfair din yun sa part naten kase nakakapagpasaya nga tayo pero tayo mismo, hindi naman masaya. :( kase hindi naman wholeheartedly yung pagmamahal na yun. And at the end, makakasakit lang tayo. :|

Both situations have the same ends, it’s either tayo ang masasaktan or makakasakit tayo ng iba. Of course, we don’t want both to happen. So it’s better kung wag na lang naten ipilit ang isang bigay. Sabe nga sa quote, “If two people are really meant to be together, they will find their ways back to each other.” and if not, we can find someone better.

I ain't searching, I'm just waiting for the right time.

I remember when I said to myself that after the board exam, I can now open my heart/self wholly into love matters/relationships, besides I’m on the right age and already pursued my studies, and I know that Dad would now allow me to. Hence, love would not be a burden anymore, unlike when I was still a student wherein I should prioritize and focus on my studies which I consider very significant. 

As of now, I’m not searching for it, I know that love will find my way, in God’s perfect plan and time, All I have to do is take one step at a time, likewisethere’s no need to rush! :)

The Antagonist and the Comrade.

Everyone needs connection with other people and that's what we called "socialization". When we socialize we tend to make friends, and by having friends, we share moments, memories and experiences with them and show who really we are, and this makes a good connection. But not all that we socialize with can work out a good bond, some can lead to incompatibility that no matter how hard we try to adjust with them, it can’t really work out and it will most likely appear that the both of you are opposing forces by which he/she is the antagonist of your life and you’re the comrade. Sounds like a typical story in the movie wherein there is a person who’ll ruin your whole life, wherein his/her happiness is to make your life so miserable. NOOOO! SO FREAKING BAD!  SO CRUEL!  There are times that you want to runaway but you can’t, because you already have a connection with him/her and the worst part is, he/she is already a part of your life. SO AWFUL!  There are also times that you want to slap them in their faces and punch them so hard by being so annoyed of the way they treat you, but you can’t because your conscience tells you that it’s not the right thing to do and you should not waste your time struggle against those kind of tactless, inconsiderate, uncaring, unsympathetic, insensitive, nasty, obnoxious people, instead just focus on yourself on how you make up your own life despite of the miserable life brought by the antagonist of your life. It’s just sad to think that as a comrade you can’t defend yourself completely from that bad wicked antagonist because there will be consequences and there are things that you consider: FIRST, if you struggle against him/her it can cause you to a more chaotic life, so it is much better to calm down and just ignore whatever he/she says and do. SECOND, He/she will not stop to ruin your life and it will be worst than ever. So, for the betterment of everything, all we have to do is: FIRST, Pray, ask for God’s guidance to help you overcome the unpleasant feelings. SECOND, put everything on a calm approach. THIRD, Just ignore and try not to be affected with what he/she says and do. FOURTH, Don’t involve yourself in the bad vibes that he/she possessed. We just have to accept the fact that the antagonists exist in our lives for some reasons that God used the good ones as an instrument to eliminate their wickedness and transform them to a good one.

Let them do whatever they want to do, what important is, you prove to yourself as well as to that wicked antagonist that despite of  the miserable life that he/she gave you, you never give up and you possessed this good heart that he/she don’t have. And at the end, who’ll succeed? Of course the good one, the comrade in the story who showed the goodness of her heart and not the bad wicked one who has nothing to do but to ruin someone’s life and showed a horrible attitude. He/she may be the winner at the beginning but the loser at the end!

Explore, Experience and Learn.

 As we grew up we matured physically, mentally, emotionally and we learn a lot of significant things from our experience and exploration, but those are just a key we are the only ones who can nurture ourselves.  Those matters tend to bring us through developing our personality in terms of coping with the environment we used to have as well as initiating a good relationship with the folks we knew and those we will encounter in the future. In 18 years of my existence I can say that my experiences are not yet sufficient in dealing with the mysterious side of humankind and ironic aspect of reality. As a teenager with a curious characteristic, I may not be matured enough to cope up with things surrounding me like depression, so much stress, confusion and personal decisions. I think that there’s a missing puzzle that I should find out to deal with it completely. That’s why I tend to explore new things for me to gain more experiences and learn from it.

Stop, Let go and Take action

LOVE? a simple and very familiar word but complex in meaning. All of us experienced to love and to be loved. It is a special feeling that we share not only with someone special but to family, friends and everyone.
But why is it a big deal and why some of us becomes sensitive or emotional when it comes to conversations regarding love? Those are some of the simple questions about love that we cannot answer. Because when we're talking about this matter, we only based on our very own feelings and emotions which are subjective cues that we are the only ones who can feel. And those are unexplainable which cannot be reasoned out by why I feel this way? or why I chose this person?
Each and everyone of us has our very own experiences when it comes to love. It started when we found that someone who may not meet our standards but yet stolen our heart and fill the missing piece of our life. By this, we'll experience feeling of being inspired, being delightful each day even how tough our life is, being thankful for having a wonderful life despite of the circumstances that we encountered and sometimes being hurt, having so much heartaches and trying to forget. We may differ in terms of experiences but we can all relate with each others emotions.


When I watched this video entitled "Traffic light Sad-Love-Pain", I was really touched by the message and realizations come up to my mind. All I can say is woah! this video is so nice, a heartwarming one. It touches the hearts of those who watched it and I'am one of those.
According to the video, "Love is like a traffic light, there are three colors which becomes a guide for us to know when to stop, to let go and to take action."

STOP- Loving someone so much doesn't always mean they're the right one for us.
LETTING GO- Letting go doesn't mean giving up, but rather accepting that there are things that are not meant to be.
TAKE ACTION- While someone breaks your heart, there will be someone else to fix it.

Reflect.